Open letter to parents of incoming freshman of Universities and Colleges Everywhere.

Dear Parents,

Your children have to learn how to deal with their own problems. Do not call me ten times a day to try to fix things that your children [redacted] up. It is not my duty cure stupidity, irresponsibility or idiocy, and the more that you call and imply that I am not doing my job (to help to make sure that your kid succeeds), the more I hate you.

You seem to think that it is my job to be a servant and not a resource. You assume that I am solely responsible for your child and your child alone.

I know it's hard to handle, but your child is now a legal adult (for the most part). You've got to let go.

I am terrific at my job. I am good at reading students. I'm fairly good at predicting which students will succeed and which will fail, and here's something to think about: even if your children fail, it is their failure and their responsibility to fix things. Not yours. Back off.

When I taught, you NEVER would have contacted me because you thought that I had some kind of unbelievable power over your child's future. HA.

But now? Any chance you get.

I have the utmost respect for kindergarten teachers and high school counselors because they take care of children. I do not take care of children. I help adults try to figure out how to use resources to get ahead.

So if you call me and demand information and I tell you that I don't have to give it to you, you accept that information, say thank you, wish me a good day, and hang up and go and talk to your child.

Leave me alone.

Best wishes,

MA